Thursday, August 28, 2008

Brad Pitt's hilarious hairdo in "Burn After Reading"



Burn after bleaching

The Coen brothers must relish in the hilarity of forcing the stars of their latest films look like total dorks. Although nothing, nothing will top Javier Bardem's 'do in "No Country for Old Men," Brad Pitt's coif comes pretty damn close in their new film "Burn After Reading," a black comedy which premiered at the Venice Film Festival last night. Stylist Waldo Sanchez get the hair credit for this film. It's so great. Look at the volume, the roots, the gelled bulletproofness of it all. Awesome.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Bill Clinton at the Democratic Convention

"I think he and Obama have talked more in the last week than they've probably talked all their lives. When you have things like this, it gets pretty wild, there's a healing process. My sense is the healing process is accelerating."
~ James Carville

Check out the Kennedyesque rockstarrish cred that Bill Clinton still has going on. The crowd went completely wild tonight when he took the stage at the NDC to voice his support for Obama. Charisma charisma charisma. Up in the balcony, Chelsea was beaming, but a flash of something, envy perhaps, appeared on Hillary's face. Then the Senator had put on her happy countenance by the second time the camera cut to her. Clinton gave a great speech. Too bad we have a two term limit. We could use this guy back in the White House (no offense, Obama). And kudos to Florida Representative Kendrick Meek for a fantastic introduction.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Newport Harbor, Rhode Island


Look at this sweet boat. Isn't it a beauty? Welcome to Newport, home to some of the most gorgeous sailboats in the world. I took this pic as we approached the harbor yesterday. I was hoping to see the Puma racing boat built for the Volvo Ocean Race, but it had already left the shipyard for the October start of the race in Europe.


These are some pics I took last night at twilight of the marina we docked at. I love the way the metal building reflects the setting sun.


The slip next to us has a satellite dish rigged up to the pylon. Guess they live there. That's the beautiful Newport Bridge in the background.


I shot a bunch of pics from the top deck and threw together a quick David Hockney-esque panorama. Click on the above photo to enlarge.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Slummin' it in the 'hood

Home

I started my yachtie job last week. I am a stew, which is short for stewardess, on the yacht in the pic. I'm in charge of haus-frauing, bartending, cocktail serving, food serving, ordering floral arrangements and buying provisions. My mettle was tested on Friday night when we had a very formal dinner cruise for a party of ten. Yikes! It's hard work and long hours now in peak season, but it's a lot of fun and the three crew guys I work with are awesome and funny. Out of respect for the owner's privacy (plus the fact that I will be signing a confidentiality agreement soon), I don't want to say the name of the yacht, but it's a sweet 101-foot floating palace.



Even our crew quarters, which remind me of camp with bunkbeds and a teeny little shower, are pretty nice as far as crew quarters usually go. However, the captain's so cool that he lets me sleep in one of the swanky guest staterooms whenever one is available. When we're full, I share a room with captain and cheffie. Above is my sleeping cocoon. I love it, but it wouldn't be ideal for those who are claustrophobic. It's not even high enough to allow for sitting up in bed. Luckily the ceiling is soft padded leather because sometimes I forget.



This is the view of my new neighborhood from my new floating home. I especially love the CAR perched atop the boat down the dock from us. What do they do, pull into a harbor and call 1-800-CRANE ME to take it off? The rich never cease to crack me up.

On the other side of us is Jimmy Buffet's megayacht. Strains of Margaritaville are not wafting through the air, thank God. Instead, the owners of the yacht in the slip next to us left last night and in what is obviously celebratory jubilation, the crew has trance music pumping loud right now. Woo!

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Sparks 'n' critters




Last weekend my brother-in-law Alen was barbecuing. I thought these shots without the flash were cool. See that critter in the background walking on the sidewalk. Looks like a cat, right?

Seven!

Wrong! And this is the outskirts of New York City. Who knew there was such wilderness in Queens? My sister puts out dry cat food for them. Isn't that nice of her? Here's Dr. Doolittle herself.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Cokie Roberts, political pundit, dumbass


Obama at Punahou, '72


“Going off this week…I know his grandmother lives in Hawaii and I know Hawaii is a state, but it has the look of him going off to some sort of foreign, exotic place. He should be at Myrtle Beach if he’s going to take a vacation at this time. I just think this is not the time to do that.”

~ Cokie Roberts on Barack Obama's choice of vacation destination

The Seattle Post Intelligencer reports:

[She] then talked about his "odd" choice during her Monday gig on National Public Radio.

Roberts is a D.C. creature. Her father was House Majority Leader. Her mother served in Congress. A brother, Tommy Boggs, is one of the capital's most prominent lobbyist-fixers. And her husband, Stephen Roberts, was the New York Times' man at the White House during the Reagan administration.


Um, newsflash, newslady. Not only does his grandmother who raised him live on Oahu, Barack Obama was born in Honolulu and grew up there, attending the swanky Punahou prep school. He was only away from the Aloha State for four years from age six to ten when he lived with his mom in Indonesia.

So he's pretty much a local, and this vacation is more like him returning to his hometown. I find it hard to believe such a well-respected "journalist" could blow it so big time. But she did.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Drunken sailors



What is it about boat people that makes us such renown boozebags? Everyone told me that yacht crews are notorious partiers, which I already surmised, but damn, can my co-workers throw them back.

After my first day of work as a stew, the boat's owner sprung for dinner for his crew to welcome me aboard, which was super nice. So the captain, the cook, the first mate and I went to bar number one where we had a round. They wouldn't let me pay.

Then we went to dinner at a really nice restaurant, where some of us had two rounds and some of us even finished with a Sambuca (not me). They pranked me good when the waitress came out with a cake blazing with candles singing "Happy Birthday" -- to me. I was dying laughing, as it wasn't even my birthday. These guys are hilarious. And, they wouldn't let me put a dollar toward the tab.

Then we went to the next bar, where after a pint of Bass, I was done drinking, or so I thought. On his way to order the next round, the first mate says:

FIRST MATE: What are you drinking?

ME: No more for me, thanks. I've had two beers and two glasses of wine, if I have any more I'll be hungover for work tomorrow.

FIRST MATE: So in other words, another Bass.

And yeah, I drank it. And they wouldn't let me pay.

Then I get dragged to the next bar. And more drinking ensues. And again, they wouldn't let me pay.

After staggering up the gangway at midnight, I was close to death this morning. Seriously, I am not going to party with my co-workers on work nights anymore. These sailors will drink me under the table and probably out of a job.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

One laid-back attack dog



I loved this German Shepherd. You just know this dog is alpha cool. He was chillin' like a villain on Main Street in Sag Harbor, on top of the SUV belonging to Long Island K-9, a private canine security firm for which he obviously is Employee of the Month. I guess he was on his lunch break, up there on the boss's ride, scoping out the bitches. Get it? Bitches? Hahaha.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Send a care package to a derserving marine


Click on the logo to find 500 marines waiting to distribute your care packages to over 13,000 troops.

A couple of years ago I blogged about AnySoldier.com. It's a great non-profit organization that allows civilians to find American military troops stationed abroad who have requested care packages. Watching Generation Kill reminded me of how sucky their living conditions can be, especially in Iraq. And now with the recent buildup of troops in Afghanistan, thousands of more soldiers, marines, air force and navy troops will be deployed to fight the increasingly aggressive Taliban there.

For a recent informative article about Marines taking on the Taliban in Afghanistan, U.S. News and World Report has an online version here.

One thing I learned from watching Generation Kill is that marines have to "make do" more than army soldiers when it comes to supplies. They just don't have the budget to supply what's really needed, even batteries for their night-vision goggles. One military tech blog writes about the show:
. . . drivers are bargaining for salvaged hoses and gaskets for their busted Humvees, and grabbing smuggled batteries brought in by an embedded reporter from Rolling Stone for their NVGs. "It's like Gilligan's Island—they're giving us rocks and coconuts to make radios with," says one. Yes, recon Marines are legendary for getting things done quick and dirty, but when low-rank Marines are spending $500 or more of their own money for parts for their own trucks—damn. That may come as no surprise to anyone who has been or knows someone who has been deployed, but for us sitting here watching HBO in our living rooms, it's something we can't be reminded of enough.

This time I chose to send a care package to a group of ten ETT (Embedded Training Team) marines in Kabul who are mentoring men in the Afghan National Army, which, according to a NYT story last week, is supposed to double in number to 120,000 troops by next year. I tried to include their requests for socks and toiletries, the much-requested batteries, candy, and snacks, but I also added some fun stuff like Macanudo cigars, Skoal (yuk), boy-type magazines, energy fuel for those long, sleepless nights, a "cardio hula" workout DVD which I hope they find funny, a dictionary and thesaurus to keep them sharp, and of course, the necessary Groucho Marx glasses.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

The death of Chef



Isaac Hayes died at his home today using his treadmill. Bummer. Even though Chef already died in the Season 10 premiere titled "The Return of Chef"(and what a revoltingly gruesomely hilarious passing it was), this time we really must bid adieu. Rest in peace Isaac/Chef.

The Shark Tow-In Champion

The New Zealander who posted this video to his YouTube account lists in his profile that his vids include "illegal, banned and rejected commercials, spoofs, very virals, director cuts, underground campaigns and exclusive previews."

So whether this tasty video is real or not, it's hard to say, but it's pretty darn cool nonetheless.


Thursday, August 7, 2008

What's my age again?

ME: I want to get high and go see Pineapple Express tonight.
MY SISTER: What are you, fifteen?




Later on . . .

ME: I sent an email to the hot guy in Generation Kill, and guess what?
MY SISTER: What?
ME: He wrote back, from his personal email account no less! How hot is that?
MY SISTER: You're writing to movie stars now? I swear, you're worse than a teenaged girl!

Laugh all you want, but you may change your mind once you meet my new pen pal, Rudy.





Monday, August 4, 2008

My new workplace


I scored my dream job, and this is going to be my new home-slash-workplace. And it's got all the onboard SCUBA equipment you could want. All three people who showed up for my second interview today -- captain, first mate, and chef -- were wearing rubber slippers, as was I. We're off to a good start so far. A week from today, I start! Stokeriffic!

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Exteriors of Sag Harbor



I'm back in the Hamptons for a second interview for my dream job du jour. I took a walk this morning and loved this front entrance. It is the most tastefully done nautically-themed one I've ever seen. I love the old-fashioned, sterling-silver, surface-mounted mortise lock. Not that I would have known what that was called, but my interior designer guru / host is hovering over my shoulder as I write this driving me crazy making sure I understand the technical specificity of its correct nomenclature.





The house I'm staying at, which belongs to a Broadway director/actor with unbelievable design sense, has this stencil painted onto it instead of normal numbers, which I find is a pretty unique and far out idea.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Jeremy Piven's sweet ass '77 Bronco

pic courtesy of Defamer

"Headsets are for nerds and squares and I'm not a nerd by any stretch of the imagination." ~ Jeremy Piven

No, you're not, baby, especially in those hot wheels of yours. I've always had a little crush on you, and now it's a teeny bit bigger. Men who drive open-air 1970s Broncos? Points points and more points.

And one more point for the fact that you don't wear that stupid little blinking Bluetooth thing on your ear, either. God, those bug me.

Friday, August 1, 2008

Provincetown, Massachusetts



This is the farthermost point of the Cape Cod peninsula, where I spent the day with my sister yesterday in beautiful, artsy Provincetown.



Like the plate says, I just had to eat at . . .



this venerable, Zagat-rated institution, also the most frequently painted landmark in town. The seafood is so good. I had a bowl of steamers, the most delicious albeit most visually offensive appetizer ever consumed by modern man.



Behold the steamer, dipped first in broth to remove any sand, and then in melted butter. This one is a behemoth. Poor Christine is allergic to shellfish and even looking at one makes her ill. She couldn't bear to watch me eat these creatures.



The sixteen-dollar lobster roll was worth every cent. So delicious it sent me into gastronomic bliss.



After eating we went gallery hopping. There are currently about fifty galleries in Provincetown, and we explored almost every one.



I loved this painting, but it was unsigned, unidentified, and the gallery guy was yakking on the phone during our entire visit, so the artist remains a mystery.

"Chris" by Miriam Preissel

We loved the M.I.T. Gallery, which has nothing to do with the Cambridge geekfest but instead everything to do with Men In Tutus. The owner/photographer was a really nice person, too.





There's one house in town that is particularly quirky. This sculpture in the front yard I named Warrior Angel. I loved the way the late afternoon sun illuminated the giant quartz crystal in his staff.



I also liked the way the light shone through these glass outdoor sculptures.



I had to explain to my sister the whole Prince Albert captive bead ring concept that this inn so hilariously incorporated as its logo. She was unaware of the type of personal jewels the prince had made popular, as enlarged here in the bottom right corner. I wonder what gauge that is?



More good pre-dusk light, this time shining through the cupola of this old house. The word comes from the Latin cupella (for cup) because it resembles an upside-down cup.



Cool window.



I would be hesitant to fly this Jolly Roger. Call me superstitious but I've heard of really bad luck happening to those who fly this on their boats (divers drowning, equipment malfunctioning, etc.).



At this inn, the guests were partying with a bottle of Clicquot. Nice.



Dusk. This is at the west end of Commercial Street where it meets Route 6A, near the 1.2 mile-long breakwater, at land's end. This is it -- the very tip of the Cape.